I never really thought much about Valentine’s Day. As a kid, it was always just my sister’s birthday, and I felt special because my dad happened to buy me flowers on that day too. It was her day though, so even as I grew older and all of my friends were freaking out about what their boyfriends were planning, or that they didn’t have a boyfriend on Valentine’s Day, I just never really cared.
Today would have been Cecily’s 40th birthday. For those of you who don’t know, my sister died when she was just nineteen years old, and I was seventeen. After that, Valentine’s Day was a sad day for me. In my mind, Valentine’s day is still her birthday, and I find it really hard to wrap my head around the fact that this would have been her big 4-0. Even though I am slowly inching towards forty myself (which I really can’t comprehend), it seems so old to me because she will forever be nineteen in my mind.
While her life was cut short, she gave it her all during the years she was here. She knew how to love, and the people she cared for, felt it. Even though we weren’t close in our teenage years, I always felt her love.
In recent years, Valentine’s Day has had new meaning for me, and I have made a conscious effort to let some of the sadness go. My sister wouldn’t have wanted me to be sad on this day. I do miss her, but this truly was her favorite day of the year, so I will celebrate. I did get engaged on this day five years ago, which was so special. I do receive candy and flowers, and I now have a three year old who notices the “love decorations” everywhere.
Seeing my little girl’s excitement surrounding this holiday got me thinking. I don’t want to deprive her of that enthusiasm. As commercial as this holiday can be, what’s more beautiful than a holiday dedicated to love?! This doesn’t have to be about being part of a couple, but a day to appreciate all of the love in our lives, and an opportunity to love a little more.
I truly believe that it’s not what we have in life that matters…it’s love that makes our lives full. The love of our family, the love of our friends, the love of our partners (if you have one), and the love of yourself is really what brings lasting joy to our lives.
You have to give love to get love, and fully receiving it is challenging for many. On this day dedicated to love, try and open your heart. Tell someone you love them, give a friend a really good hug, smile at a stranger, notice all the love in your life, and show appreciation for it.
I told my daughter, Charlotte, that Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love, and she thinks this is the greatest thing ever. She said to me, “Mommy, I love, love!!” I love, love too, so I’m sending it out to each and every one of you today!
If you don’t have all the love in your life that you hope for, pay attention to the love you do have, and make an effort to give even more. Giving love feels just as good, if not better than getting it…and what you give, is what you get. Happy love day to all!
