I recently heard someone say, “What you want, may not be what you need, and what you need, may not be what you want.” What do ya think about that?
For me, it was very clear that hearing this at that moment was EXACTLY what I needed. I had been struggling with a very difficult decision I made. This decision affected another person, and this is what made it so challenging for me.
You see, I’ve been a people pleaser my whole life. I have often found myself making decisions for the sake of others for various reasons. Sometimes it’s because I genuinely want to, and at other times the reasoning isn’t as constructive. I sometimes find myself making decisions based on others’ needs because it’s “easier,” I don’t want to let someone else down, or because I want to be perceived a certain way. This is never good for anyone and often leaves me feeling resentful.
The decision I found myself facing last week was painful because I knew in my heart what I wanted, but I also knew how another would be affected and that this person most likely wouldn’t be happy and wouldn’t understand. I found myself feeling angry and sad. This was not something I was in the mood for, it was not something I asked for, and it was not something I wanted. I do see though, that it was something I needed.
Making decisions for myself and my own needs is an area of my life where I have, in recent years, tried to make progress. Because of this, my circumstance last week was the perfect opportunity to do things differently. I can’t say it was easy and that it wasn’t a struggle, and a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, but I knew without a doubt, what needed to be done. I made a decision for me, and spoke my truth, and that was big for me.
Are you dealing with something right now that the child inside you is stomping her feet and yelling, “Nooooooo, I don’t want this”? Maybe you’ve found yourself wanting to lose ten pounds yet again, or your child is having another tantrum, or you find yourself feeling dissatisfied with your job, love life, or living situation. Or, maybe you are facing a difficult decision. Is it possible that this is exactly what you need right now in this moment?
When faced with challenges in life, you can choose to view them as opportunities, rather than obstacles. The universe has a very interesting way of getting your attention. Where there is room to grow in your life, there will regularly be opportunities for you to work on changing for the better. When you get cranky, angry, sad, or annoyed about a situation, you are just resisting reality, which will always feel crappy. When you open your eyes to the possibility for positive growth, coping with whatever is at hand becomes smoother and more manageable, and very intriguing!
Now this does not mean whenever you are faced with something tricky, you should jump for joy, woo hooing. I certainly don’t find myself getting excited to deal with issues that feel difficult. I do, however, try and see the opportunity for growth. I do ask myself, “How can I handle things in the most productive manner possible?” and now I will tell myself, “I may not want this, but it is exactly what I need.”
What do you need right now? Pay attention…chances are, it’s staring you right in the face!
Happy day everyone!
P.S.-Wishing you all a happy and fun-filled July 4th!
